30 September 2006

Give Dr. Kevorkian An Advice Column

Dear Prudie,

I just had my three-year anniversary with my boyfriend. He was married when we first met, and we eventually had a very brief affair before he left his wife. He has two children with her, whom I have a great relationship with and love very much. I am beginning to think it was a mistake and we rushed too quickly into getting serious. Now that we have settled into our life together (we bought a house), I find we have less and less in common and am starting to see that our long-term goals and dreams are vastly different. Thoughts of breaking up have crossed my mind. Although at the time I believed he left his wife because his marriage was over, I now know that I played a much greater role in bringing about the end of their marriage. I have so much guilt over how our relationship started and now feel even more guilt that I effectively stole someone else's life, a life that they wanted, and now I don't want it anymore. I also find it increasingly harder to deal with the fact that friends and family will always see me as the other woman or him as a scoundrel. I'm sure his ex would love to see our relationship fail as she hates my guts and I know that hearing about me from her children is torture. Sometimes I wish he would leave me and get back together with her. Am I entitled to familial happiness after what I did? I don't want to hurt him, and I especially don't want to hurt his children any more than I already have. I can't reach the decision to leave but am not happy staying. Is this my punishment for what I did?
Every once in a while, when I'm in my car I find myself listening to Dr. Laura. Whenever this happens, I am struck anew by how mean and nasty she is to the callers, who have apparently never heard the show before, or are masochists. Now, radio shrink shows (and sob sister columns) are necessarily scams. The host pretends to offer advice and therapy in 30 second increments, but is really just using the caller's pain and perversion to attract listeners so she can sell advertising. Only Dr. Laura, though, makes it a point to tell her scummy callers that they are scum. As we can see from this letter to "Dear Prudence," it really should be a more widespread practice.

2 comments:

David said...

I'll bet it had something to do with trying to work everything out by talking her feelings through with everybody and, of course, putting the children first.

Not so much.

Unknown said...

Next to men, women have to be the stupidest people on earth. Prudie was way too easy on her. It amazes me how many wishful lies women can tell themselves when it comes to entering into a relationship with a man. Lies both about their own motives and the motives of the men they fall in love with.